The Sixty Fifth Year Ends

The Sixty Fifth year ended four days ago.  The year flew by in so many ways and as I mentally recount this extraordinary year, my jaw drops for it was above and beyond ordinary.

I did not even begin to recount within the blog the journeys, experiences and thoughts of these last 12 months.  That statement alone reminds of the adventures that were mine.  They were above and beyond the realm of believable for this lady.  

I experienced miracles that still cause me to catch my breath.  I was protected and blessed beyond description.  I was in mud huts and mansions that few will ever see on either spectrum. 

I began my travels in May of 2015 going to Israel.  From there the travels just did not end. Dubai, Zambia, Honduras, Oregon, Washington, Cabo, Mexico, Germany, Switzerland, France, a variety of Caribbean Islands 2x and ending now in Cuba. I traveled by jet, I got to fly first class across the Pond!! I rode or drove in normal every day cars and had a land rover to navigate the deep sand in Zambia. I rode in trucks with very bad shocks.  Eurail took me from Frankfurt Germany to Basil, Switzerland.  A Swiss tram in Basil, a Mercedes ‘cab’ in Germany that was pure luxury and tour busses.   Who does that in 12 month’s time?

The transportation adventures were amazing in their own right. The  countries and islands experiences were  beyond my imagination.  I sat in a meeting with the Vice President of Zambia.  I was summoned with my group to ‘squat’ before a King in Mongu as we discussed the work we do for his people.  We had to remain below his head at all times.   I was 50 miles from Paris when ISIS bombed it.  I had a witch who had joined my women’s retreat and wanted to put a white spell upon me.  A man under my watch on this same retreat fell to his death from the 10^th balcony of a ship.  In between these few sentences were hours of experiences, emotions, fears and delights.   I end my year by being on the first cruise ship to sail from the US to Cuba in over 50 years.  The ship was older, elegant and refurbished beautifully.

I shared this summary of the Sixty Fifth year to say this.  I would not trade what I learned for anything.   There were rough days but each of those rough times were growing times where my help came from the Lord.  I delighted many times with the awareness of God’s protection and provisions.  I met new friends. I had a good friend enter eternity and I feel the loss deeply. I mourn with their families.   I experienced life outside of my Mayberry community and hopefully grew as a human being. 

I will enter this next year that I am calling Route 66. I know that title is not very original but it defines the upcoming year well.  Once again a new path will be forged.  I will do some of the planning but life will interrupt those plans. With a sense of awe and expectation that life should not be ordinary I will embark on each day. 

We each touch the lives of others.  If we stay alert there are grand adventures awaiting us.  There are places to go and people to meet.

Now that is old!

  This old guy Socrates was born in 470 BC!  That is almost 2500 years ago!  2500 years I cannot put my head around this number.  I am dealing with my mortality, my 65th year is closing soon. He too was a living, breathing man.  Life changes, our bodies change and we will soon be gone from this earth. 

The secret of change is to focus all your energy not on fighting the old but building on the new. 

Socrates

As I muddle through this journey called life, I am coming to grips (I hope) with the fact that I am here for a brief moment in time but it is God's time.   I look in the mirror and think who is this person staring back at me.    I am still me!  I become older each day and knowing that God has numbered my days. There is no guarantee of a tomorrow or of a next year.  However, there is this moment and so far this day.  What am I going to do with it?

I am watching my life change.  Is it a comfortable thought? No!  Because I am not the change agent.  However, I want to embrace life and take advantage of each day, I want to remain curious as I was as a child!

I will embrace my next opportunity to engage in the culture.  I will embrace my next opportunity to travel or do missions work or both (they often go together).    Will I be comfortable?  Probably not.

But the alternative to not having a bucket list, not embracing an adventure or engaging with someone who is not of my generation is to die a slow, non productive, selfish death.  God has each of here for a purpose it is not to watch the clock tick until He takes us home.

Mother's Day

I was not going to blog today.  I was enjoying the beautiful weather, the slow pace that the day was offering.  My kids fixed dinner, I decided I really like this.  For I realize life is fragile, short and special moments are not forever moments.  I am savoring my blessings and pondering what another year will bring.

Today is one that so many women hate.  For that I am so very sad.  In my Facebook post today I shared the following for it is a day that we should all take stock of what it represents, life.  

"Mothers Day. What a day of emotions. Some are sad for they are not mothers, their mothers are gone, their mothers never 'showed up', their mothers are .... However, you are reading this because you had a mother and God deemed you worthy to be here. You are an influencer of people mother or not. You are special. So today I celebrate you who have no children but give back to others. I celebrate the knowledge that one Hallmark Day does not determine ones value. I celebrate the awesome mothers who are out there trying to do the best you can to raise little people in this hard world. I celebrate my daughter Christine, who is a great mom, my daughter Becky who is an incredible aunt. My mother who loves her family. My sister who has the capacity to give and to love beyond anyone one I know and to each women who has the capability to change lives regardless of her title.   Celebrate those who are mom's! " 

Today I take this scripture as it sums up the emotions of this day. 

Rejoice with those who rejoice, weep with those who weep. Romans (Bible) 12:1 

But do not resent,  for that emotion robs you alone.  Life is never fair.  I have learned that the most miserable people around are those who focus on 'what they do not have' and resent that others appear to have that very desired thing.  Look for ways that you can invest in another's life.   A scriptural principle that I yet to find false is below.  Give it a try. 

For if you give, you will get! Your gift will return to you in full and overflowing measure, pressed down, shaken together to make room for more, and running over. Whatever measure you use to give—large or small—will be used to measure what is given back to you.” Luke (Bible) 6:38-40 NLT

God numbers our days!

My hit or miss blog pretty much sums up my 'planned' life.  Mine is anything but routine.  I love to share thoughts in writing. Does anyone read them?  Unknown.  The writing down of my thoughts seals them for me. 

I have 4 blogs to post in my que.  Because?  I set them aside to post later. The timing of the subject mater is just not quite right.  Today's posting is not one I want to post or even share.  My heart is so very heavy.  It is probably one of the hardest to put into words for my emotions, fears, thoughts are running deep and wild. 

I received a message yesterday from a dear Nigerian friend.  He has been in my life for probably 15+ years.  I met him in CA.  We shared the same breakfast table in a hotel restaurant one morning.  He is a scientist and was there for work.  I was in CA for a women's conference.  Because he was bold enough to bow his head to pray over  his meal, I was eager to know if he was a Jesus follower as I am.  Yes :) Our friendship began, and he has taught me many things about faith, hope and life as an African. 

Our countries were so very different. At the time ours was very stable, a place people desired to come to be safe, find a better life and freedom to worship.  His was fraught with corruption, greed, Islamic terrorists, satanic/demonic practices and more.  His desire was/is to  teach young men how to work, to care for their families, women to be educated and wise. His most important message is to seek Jesus as the only true God who gives a promise of heaven. No strings attached!  No virgins, no working it out, no nothing but accepting His payment for our sins.   A clean simple, true message.

He has warned me over and over for US citizens to watch out for ISIS/ISIL, Islamic fanatics.  "Claudia, they are coming to America. One day you too will be where we are."

In my friends message to me yesterday he sent a plea for me to care for his family, when he is killed.  He sent to me their contact info and shared that I would know he was dead via the media.  He has a huge target upon his back.  He is a leader with strong Christian ties and influence.  He has suspected for a time he would be targeted but yesterdays message to me was filled with sad, serious anticipation that soon he would be leaving this earth.

What would you do with a message like this?  I am thousands of miles away.  I am an average citizen here with no clout.  If I had clout to change anything would it matter?   This is news stuff that affects people you never knew, in other parts of the world, that 'someone' else would help if it was needed. Not your friend!  Not someone close and personal! This global crisis has now landed in my small town, in the US.

He knows his enemy and they are ruthless.  He knows because of his relationship with Jesus Christ, that choice will most likely be the end of his earthly life.  Once again he is teaching me how to live.  Of course he is afraid, for who wants to be murdered?  Of course he wants protection for his family, all good men desire this.  He will remain true and faithful the the Lord.

As I close this reflection, I share that my only way to help is to pray.  Will the reader of this blog pray with me? My prayer is that you will pray safety for those who are bold enough to stand up for evil.  My prayer too is that those who read this and do not know Jesus as the only one to give eternal life and forgiveness for our sins is that you seek Him out soon.  Evil is sweeping this world.  You and I will not be exempt from it claws.  Our only hope is in the one who give to us eternal life, Jesus Christ.  Every thing else offers eternal death.

For to me to live is Christ, and to die is gain. Philippians (Bible) 1:21

For I am not ashamed of the gospel (God's good news to mankind), for it is the power of God for salvation to everyone who believes. Romans (Bible) 1:16 

Heaven - There's Robby!

I have a friend who is hours away from leaving this earth.  He is suffering but he is at peace.  He knows where he is going.  I want to share in this blog today an account that I keep close by to share with people who are close to entering eternity. It comforted me when my Kara died.  It delights me each time read it.  God is real! Heaven is real!  Are you ready to meet Him?
 

“There’s Robby!”

 “Mrs. Armisted’s younger son Humphrey, who was twelve at the time of this story grew up to become pastor the Friendship Presbyterian Church between Montreat and Black Mountain, North Carolina.  In Montreat, after his death, his lovely widow, Lucille, told me this story in 1967.  I wrote it down in a notebook.  But to make sure I had it accurately and also to ask permission to include it in this book, (Legacy of a Pack Rat – Ruth Bell Graham) I wrote to Lucille Armisted, who is living in Florida.  Her gracious reply, on her return from celebrating her eighty-ninth birthday with her son, said, “I am so glad to send you the story, and I’m happy that you will use it.”    I checked her account with my twenty-one-year-old notes. The facts were, except for small, unimportant details, identical.”

**********

       The room was quiet and semi-darkened.  The elderly lady lying against the pillows listened as her son, Robert, talked of the family, her friends and other things of interest to her.

         She looked forward to his daily visits.  Madison, where he lived was not too far from Nashville, and Robert spent as much time as he could with his mother, knowing, as ill as she was, each visit might be his last. As he talked, his eyes took in every detail her loved face, every line—and there were more lines than curves now—the white hair, the tired, still loving eyes. When time came to leave, he kissed her gently on her forehead, assuring her he would be back the next day.

         Arriving back at his home in Madison, he found Robin, his seventeen-year-old, was ill with a strange fever.  The next few days his time was completely taken up between his son and his mother. He did not tell his mother of Robin’s illness.  He was her oldest grandson-the pride and joy of her life.

         Then, suddenly, Robin was gone.  His death shocked the whole community as well as his family.  The whole thing had happened so quickly.  And seventeen was too young to die.

         As soon as the funeral was over, Mr. Armistead hurried to his mother’s bedside, praying nothing in his manner would betray the fact he had just buried his firstborn. It would be more than his mother could take in her condition. The doctor was in the room as he entered.  His mother was lying with her eyes closed. “She’s in a coma,” the doctor said gently.  He knew something of the strain this man had been under, his faithful visits to his mother, the death of his son, and the funeral from which he had just come…

          

The doctor put his hand on Mr. Armistead’s shoulder in wordless sympathy. “Just sit beside her,” he said, “she might come to…” And he left them together. Mr. Armistead’s heart was heavy as he sat in the gathering twilight. He lit the lamp on the bedside table, and the shadows receded. Soon she opened her eyes, and smiling in recognition, she put her hand on her son’s knee.

“Bob…” she said his name lovingly-and drifted into a coma again.  Quietly Mr. Armisted sat on, his hand over hers, his eyes never leaving her face.  After awhile there was a slight movement on the pillow.  His mother’s eyes were open and there was a far-off look in them, as if she were seeing beyond the room. A look of wonder passed over her face. 
 

“I see Jesus, she exclaimed, adding, “why there’s father…and there’s mother…” And then, “And there’s Robby! I didn’t know Robby had died…”  Her hand patted her son’s knee gently.   “Poor Bob…,” she said softly and was gone.      

 
“For God loved the world in this way: He gave His One and Only Son, so that everyone who believes in Him will not perish but have eternal life.  For God did not send His Son into the world that He might condemn the world, but that the world might be saved through Him. John 3:16-17 (Bible)  

"Did you know?"

 

I wish as I write this I could say that I never gossiped.  Oh, the nasty, nasty delight of being able to tell something so interesting about another seems to be something humans love to do.  How many times have you shared a 'bit' of information that did not have to be shared or even should have been shared?

None of us would own that we are gossips. Or that we delighted in the telling of the 'story'.  Both men and women are equally guilty of this horrible trait.  I have sat in restaurants, coffee shops, air ports and I have discovered that the conversations that take place around me are people talking about other people. Often it is a critique of a job, a marriage, a 'friendship'.   "Did you know....?" seems to be an easy and seeming innocent intro to the path of talking poorly of another.   "I just found out...." is another opening.  "I have been thinking ...." or " I just want you know that...." generally leads to one spewing a negative about another.  Can you relate?  What was your last conversation about?

In this journey of 'aging' I am discovering that opinions that differ from mine are fodder for gossip.  Fear of things not going my way is another base for me to speak poorly of another.  Control probably could be lumped into that last sentence but my need for life to go my way, on my terms, in my time will loosen my tongue and reveal my heart. 

As a Christ follower I wish I could say that I always took my frustrations to Him and ran them over His grid of fairness and grace.  I wish I could say that I was willing to bring my fears of life not going my way to Him instead of trying make situations go in my direction via manipulation or demands.  I wish I could say that I trusted Him to make things right in relational issues.  But I can't.  

What I can say as I end today's reflections is that I am working on this nasty trait.   I so do not want to be known by negative, critical words that are fueled from my heart. 

Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be acceptable in your sight, O Lord, my rock and my redeemer. Psalm 19:14

Change of Location

It is Easter a.m.  I should be getting ready for church.  This is always a Sunday that I delight in.  The celebration of all that makes Christianity unique is honored on this day.  Easter separates Christianity from all religions.  The one we follow died but rose again.  The one we follow does not require that I make myself right before He accepts me.  He made everything right on Good Friday.  He paid for my sins.  The best part is that I can do nothing for Him to love me more.  I just accepted His payment gift for my sins and I now seek to love and to serve Him as He has blessed me.

After Good Friday, One Messy Saturday (http://claudssixtyfifthyear.blogspot.com/2016/03/one-messy-saturday.html) yesterdays post, I come to this day.  The day that changed the world and will continue to change the world.

Today many will walk through the doors of our church or a church.  Many who never come any other time but do so for many reasons.  Why?  Tradition perhaps. However, tradition never satisfies the need of a savior.  Religion? Religion is mans attempt to define a god.  Acts of contrition, of kindness or anything does not get one to heaven. Even showing up at a church today does not make a bit of difference. 

My hope and prayer is that on this celebration day the seeker, the questioner, the skeptic will pause and ask why Jesus?  Then begin to figure out the why? To the skeptic I say do your own investigative research.  I will never convince you.

God says: "You will seek Me and find Me when you search for Me with all your heart." Jeremiah (Bible) 29:13.

I do not tout a religion.  I do fellowship and worship with other Christ followers.  They are less than perfect as am I.  However, we do life together in a world that is not embracing to us.  We are humbly grateful that the one we worship, is alive, active in our lives and apart from Him we are a doomed, mess.

Check out Jesus!   You will never be the same. 

 

One Messy Saturday!

This morning I was laying in bed thinking about what Saturday must have been like in Jerusalem the day following Good Friday.  Random thoughts raced through my brain.  I was in a world that was reeling from the aftermath of the most horrible act known to man kind. It wasn't just a killing that took place.  It was God making Himself known to mankind and speaking to the world!

Yesterday, because of social media the whole Good Friday message was made known to the world.  Even if your friends and people did not care or know about it, they knew this was a day of focus for Christians.  Believers were somber and reflective, non-believers were 'what ever'.

Biblical accounts of Good Friday are consistent with history.  The Bible is a history book.  The account of the Crucifixion and other noted activities were also documented by historians of the time. These other activities are often over looked by the horrific unjust crucifixion. However, these other events are not to be ignored or overlooked.

*The earth was black from noon to 3 p.m. 
*There was a terrible earthquake.
*Tombs and graves were opened up (not all tombs and graves).
*Then within the Temple the Holy Place where the Jews worshiped and God met the High Priest once a year, at Passover, to accept sacrifices for the sins of man, the veil was torn from top to bottom.   Humanly impossible to do!

This last fact was staggering.  Just visualize this curtain!

The veil was:
60 feet high 
30 feet wide 
the width of the curtain/veil a hand breadth (about 4")
It was woven and very heavy.    Historians say that it took 300 priests to move it due its size and weight.  

Okay those are the 'other' things that happened on Friday.

What do you do about clean up.  FEMA did not exist! Nothing could be done until Sunday, that was the law of the land.   Saturday/Sabbath for the Jews was a day of rest and work was not allowed.  What do you do with the rubble, the injured, the missing, the mess? What if your house was one that was damaged?  What if your preparations for the Sabbath had been undone or destroyed in the quake?                                            

The Temple.  A beautiful structure that was the center of everything within Jerusalem had been rearranged by its owner and designer, God.   It is a mess in more ways than one.  The Veil, the Sacred Curtain that separated man from God was destroyed. Because the Messiah and Savior had come.  People could look into that place of awe and of mystery.  What does all of this mean?  Who could have torn this down?  Confusion must have been reigning. 

If this happened yesterday in our time and culture the news would have been Tweeted, News Coverage be it CNN or Fox would be running footage of the disaster. Head lines and Tweets would read:
#Friday's crucifixion caused riots
#Roman police pulled into the fray of Crucifixion
#Unexplained black out
#Scary Friday
#Astronomers trying to figure out why everything went black from noon to three
#Chaos
#3 hours of pure fear
#Earthquake
#Creepy, graves opened up
#Help needed Jerusalem is a mess
#Homes crumbled

A SIGN AT THE TEMPLE GATE. בית סגור    Temple Closed until further notice!

God spoke through out this crucifixion process.  The Old Testament prophecies this event.  God made Himself known through His son, Jesus. 

The thief on the cross saw that Jesus was more than a mere man.  He made Jesus his Lord and Savior.   The Roman Centurion noted that Jesus was no mere man.  God spoke through His creation and no one could ignore that this death, this day was beyond ordinary. 

This messy Saturday was in the face of everyone.  What do you do with man who claimed to be the Messiah, the I AM, God?  What do you when all natures revolts because one man has been crucified?

Sunday brings another set of issues for the people to face, but today, Saturday is a real mess.




 

 

What makes a Good Friday?

I love chocolate bunnies.  I even love Peeps.  I am also known to love a new item of clothing! I love the anticipation of spring (I live in IL that season is truly up for debate as to whether it truly does exist.).  Easter seems to be the 'holiday' that marks all of these external things in our lives. It is fun, it is festive it seems to embrace all things fresh and new.
 

You can run with the Easter 'stuff' but a Good Friday?  If you come from a Christian tradition you know that Good Friday is the day that Jesus Christ  was crucified!   Killed with the intent that He would be forever removed from the religious scene.  He was such a threat that Rome had guards watching every excruciating moment from the trial to the burial. They even took seriously  His words that He would rise again seriously and placed guards at his tomb.   He was a real live human being.    Even if you do not come from a Christian tradition the television programs and movies continue to focus on this point in history.   His death was a bloody, barbaric and inhumane, torturous event.  HE still just does not go away!

How could such a bloody brutal day be 'good'?  We cringe as we see ISIS inflict crucifixions.  It is told, that of all deaths it is the most horrific and barbaric. 

Why did Jesus die like this?   Because I sinned, you sinned, we all do stuff that keep us from knowing a Holy God.  As humans we feel the need for justice when life has wronged us.  God was wronged and justice must be paid to Him for us to be right with Him.   He understood that apart from Him this could not happen.  The justice payment was so high that He alone could make the payment.   The payment was the death of Jesus (God in human form) to pay the penalty for our sin.  His creation, our sins, His terms of payment.

He created us.  He makes the rules.  He loves us and for some crazy reason desires a relationship with us.  We messed up and He decided to fix the mess.  We call it Good Friday. 

Each of us has to decide what we are going to do with Him.  What are we going to do with this day called Good Friday when the payment was made for all of the horrible, bad things that transpire in this world?  Our horrible bad things are included.  If not Him then who will exact justice and payment?

Christianity is anything but popular these days. Jesus is still a threat to religious groups and atheists.  He is a threat to those who disdain any deity or power higher than man himself. His very name evokes hate.  If He he is not God and does not still exist then why such a visceral reaction?  He just won't go away!  He can't be forced out or away!  He is God!

On Good Friday the Jesus factor was an attempt by evil man to eliminate a Holy man.  On Easter we discovered that God made known to mankind that evil would be over come. 

Do not take my word for it. Do not just go with the Easter flow of a holiday to eat your peeps and chocolate.   Seek out the truth, study who Jesus really is/was and then decide what you are going to do with Him.  IF HE truly is God and you walk away then you have left a lot on the line, your eternity with out Him.  

Jesus's words to us.    "The thief  (satan) comes only to steal and kill and destroy. I came that they may have life and have it abundantly." John (Bible 10:10)

Seeking God.

If you have been following this weeks crazy blog of me unpacking our retreat Matters of The Heart,  I know the sensational parts of evil and death pull us in.  This journey was real life, real time stuff and I am in the middle of it.  But it wasn't the essence of the retreat.

Today's blog is the sweet God movement, middle of the week, blessing thread that made the week spectacular.  It is the reason the retreat was scheduled.  It is the purpose behind the title.  It is the whipped cream and cherry piece of the sundae! 

Yesterday's blog was a confession of me wanting to jump off the responsibility wagon and 'rest my weary body'.  I still smile that my plans were deliberately thwarted by The Lord.  He was gentle in His nudging me into obedience.  He knew my stress threshold was high.  He knew it all.  I was to be obedient and in turn He delighted me with the outcomes.  Yes, the Lord does speak and direct our steps!

Thursday evening we had a concert scheduled with Damaris Carbaugh.   She came with us to teach and to sing. Such a delightful and wise lady!  During the week we encouraged our attendees to invite people to join us for a night of praise and worship.  Millie and her cohorts hit the deck running.  Wow...   God was moving.  Deborah in her delightful massage time, invited her therapist.  The room was filled! Word of mouth is the best PR around.    (http://damariscarbaugh.com/kind-words/)
The conference room doors open. Our retreat guests file in.  The invited guests also enter. What delight!  Significant is the list below.

Lana. My Sky Chapel visitor.  She knew no one.  She came and took a front row seat. She beamed and she cried.
David - the man whose life was to end the following evening. He took a front row seat. It was his last night on earth. He spent it in a concert that drew us all before The Lord.
The Beautiful Jamaican massage therapist - invited by Deborah. She never had time to worship while on the ship. She was thrilled and blessed.
The cruise staff musician. His story was that he had walked away from the Lord.  His only night off each week was Thursday.  Not a coincidence that on this night he was to return to Jesus.  He videoed the concert and wept. He was prayed with and sent back with a renewed desire to stay in communication with the Lord.
4 electric wheel chair guests who were cruising with an MS group. They squeezed in among the rows of chairs.
A couple of unidentified participants.  They slipped in after we started and out as it was ending.

Coincidence?  Not!  These appointments were not by chance.  God met them in the middle of sea, on a ship.

I learned anew that God is working and continuing to draw people back to Himself.  He allows me and those who are His followers to invite others to join in the dance of salvation.

Our pain, our longing, our broken spirits are burdens we do not need to carry alone.  God is waiting for us to call out to Him.  He also has a community, a family here on this earth to help you walk the journey as well.  I was blessed over and over by such a family. 

"When I look at your heavens, the work of your fingers, the moon and the stars, which you have set in place,what is man that you are mindful of him, and the son of man that you care for him?"  Psalm 8:4 (Bible) 

"Seek the LORD while he may be found; call on him while he is near.

Let the wicked forsake their ways and the unrighteous their thoughts. Let them turn to the LORD, and he will have mercy on them, and to our God, for he will freely pardon.

 'For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways,' declares the LORD.

“As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts."    Isaiah 53:6-10 Bible

You can run but you can't hide from God.

As I begin today's blog I do so with a bit of chagrin and also a smile.  I continue my debrief from my cruise.  I am almost done unpacking my most interesting week.  Recounting the activities both the sad and the miraculous my head continues to spin.  This week was anything but normal given just one of my experiences.  Today's read is a bit wordy but since this is my 'avoid' the shrink process, the stories must be told.

I go back to Wednesday night of cruise week.  We had sailed from Jamaica leaving behind my high maintenance attendee. Who, remember, just happened to be a real witch.  I will own that I was relieved that she was no longer under our care.  I was exhausted for I did not sleep the night before, the emotions of these events drained me. There were still 59 other people that I was responsible for and they deserved my best.

Our schedule had been established  months before we sailed.   Each morning a slot for prayer in the beautiful Sky Light Chapel, located on deck 14, had been established.  The prayer time was set for 8:00 each morning, it was optional, but important at least for me to begin my day there.  Little did I realize 'who' really set up the schedule.

Wednesday night has come! I am so ready for a good nights sleep.   A couple ladies asked me if I would be up praying on Thursday a.m.   Exhausted and in over load and I made a 'snap' decision.  "No".  On this day I was going to sleep in. :)   God wouldn't mind, He knew what I had been through.  The chapel was open for prayer but Claudia was not going to be there.  My first 'get a clue' that things would go differently, should have been that I was asked if there would be prayer.  No one had done so on previous days. 

6:30 a.m. on Thursday,  I am so wide awake that I had to get up.  I readied my self for the day but I was still skipping prayer time.   I then decided I would go down to deck 3 where the beautiful dinning room was located, I had not indulged in a served up just for you breakfast all week. This is one of my favorite cruise treats.   

I would ask for a table for one!  I would seat myself with my back to the entry as to avoid eye contact with anyone!  I would enjoy a leisurely, well deserved breakfast served to me.  I would enjoy the linen table cloth, napkins and watching the ship sail through the water outside the window next to me.  I would then begin my day.  

I get on the elevator, dressed but still dazed.  The elevator door opens I exit.  I am on deck 5, the main promenade, not deck 3.  I am immediately met by one of my speakers who says "Good morning Claudia!  I was looking for you to go and pray."  I am nailed!  I will now admit the first words out of my mouth were "Shoot"! My next response was better.  "Okay, let me grab a cup of coffee and I will join you."  Chagrined but dutiful we head up to the pinnacle of the ship.

Our time of prayer was great and needed, truly needed.   As we were winding down, a lady comes in looking a bit frantic and out of breath.  I was ready to leave but God prompted to me ask her if she needed prayer.  As I am asking her if we could pray for her, my initial thoughts were 'Oh no Claudia, you do not need another problem'.  

She says with pure excitement "Do you know Jesus?"  Ouch...we were to be in this room. She bursts out with  " I had to come up here to pray and get away from Jezebel."  Thought: OH NO, not another situation of spiritual battles.  Is this lady nuts?

As her story unfolds we find that she has newly found relationship/faith in Jesus Christ.  Her Greek tradition did not have a place for a personal savior in her mothers eyes.  Jezebel was the code name for her mother, with whom she was traveling.  In true Greek mother fashion this trip had been fraught with guilt and tears over her daughters choice to make Jesus her Lord and Savior.  So many are trapped in religion and tradition missing that neither of these things will get you to heaven or give you the gift of knowing Jesus!

Her excitement to meet other Christ followers was contagious.  She could not believe how God had answered her prayer by finding us in the chapel.  "Ouch, again."

God had literally rearranged my sleeping plans, my breakfast plans, my schedule for this divine appointment.   He had  nudged one of my speakers to pray with me on this particular morning. I still ask,  "did I push the deck 5 button?".  This adventure was not mine on any level, it was The Lords.  This encounter is and was a divine appointment.   The story of this ladies life is still entwined with mine as she grows in her knowledge of The Lord.  This story continues.

 

Joy!

I have been looking forward to this blog post! As I have been unpacking the wild and crazy ride from my retreat Matters of The Heart with my posts,  I needed to bookend the beginning and ending. Why?  Because this retreat opened up a realm of the spiritual that was fraught with evil but it did not stay in that realm.  The adversary lost!




We live in a spiritual world.  Many do not want to admit they buy into one, but they are drawn into it whether or not they believe it. The current movie genres of the supernatural world, the dark evil world, the new TV shows covering the same,  horoscopes, superstitions, tarot cards and religions are all because man has a spiritual 'hole' that must be filled some way.  People who never pray, tend to do so when in crisis's.  Or, they turn to someone who they think has a 'god' connection to pray for them. Why?  Because we know deep down that there has to be something greater than ourselves.  You may not believe in God or Jesus but one day you will. It is all real folks!

I love bringing people along with me on adventures!!!  Those who know me well, know that adventures find me, always!  I love it more when my adventures draw me into a greater awareness of God, His creation, His character and His love for us. That was the prayer for over a year regarding this retreat.

I am delighted to share that God made Himself known on day one of our retreat!!  It was our first evening in the beautiful dinning room, with our first introduction to those who would be serving us all week long.  I knew my ladies by name and I was learning to know them by face.  Dinner was ending and my attention was drawn to a group of my ladies praying over a staff person.  Wow, that is not a normal scene, especially when we had just met each other.  I knew our purpose was spiritual but this was unique.  I was captivated! We all were!

Joseph was the waiter for one of our tables.  As he introduced himself to his new guests for the week, he did not seem well and very sad.  Owning this information is not protocol for the staff! They are to be up, happy and ready to serve the guests!  They work 10-12 hour days, 7 days a week.  Pretend to be happy and carefree, they must.  They are hired to serve! When you keep those details in mind this next account is even more a God movement.   Millie (one of the most delightful and encouraging ladies I have yet to meet) asks Joseph, their waiter if he is okay.

Meet Millie!

Here is Millie's account: "Okay, we were all dining, Ruth, Susan, Suzette and myself, our server Joseph introduced himself, I notice that that he was sad, I asked him, "are you okay?".  He said no!  He shared that he  suffers from high blood pressure and at the moment he had a terrible headache,  "Would you like me to pray for you?"  I offered without hesitation.  He agreed to let me pray! I told him "my Jesus can heal anything". The Holy Spirit quickened me to ask the next question,  "Joseph would you like to know this God that we serve?"    He quickly said "yes". I led him in the prayer, right there. He kneeled down on one knee and accepted Jesus as the one to forgive his sins and give him life eternal.  Hallelujah, he was so happy!! Joy filled him! His headache never came back  and from that day on he couldn't stop smiling. Whenever we saw him he would say no more headache and smiled." 

Another layer of this story was also unfolding.  Remember we are on day one.  Each of us are wearing name badges.  Rebecca is riding in the elevator and a staff person asked her why she was wearing this name tag/badge. She shared that there were about 60 ladies on  retreat cruise to learn more about Jesus.  His face lit up!  He shared that on Thursday evening at 11:45 p.m. those on the ship that were Christ followers met to have their worship time.  He gave her his information and invited us to join them for prayer and encouragement.  When I heard this I was humbled and tears welled up.  The sacrifice to worship and to pray, trumped rest and sleep.  How many of us would worship at 11:45 p.m. because it was the only time available?  How many of us have what I call 'convenient church'?  

Meet Rebecca on the right.  Dee Brestin on the left.

Drum roll!!!   A day or two later Rebecca gave to Joseph the information of the man leading the worship each week on the ship.  She encouraged him to find this group and begin to grow in his relationship with the living God.  Drum roll!!!  This man was Joseph boss!  Joseph's  boss would be available everyday to encourage and teach Joseph spiritual truths.  Accident?  No way.  A divine appointmet on all accounts.     I share this quote with you to ponder. 

"Coincidences are spiritual puns." — G. K. Chesterton

Expect the Unexpected

   

As I continue to unpack my journey on the Matters of The Heart Retreat Cruise, and I type the  name  and theme of our week, it seems so gentle, compelling and reflective.  The location of the retreat is in the Caribbean.  We travel together on a beautiful ship.   We are indulged by offerings of food served to us in a beautiful dinning room or food available on the run, sunshine, entertainment, our beds made each morning our cabins freshened up each night  and then we take out time to reflect upon our spiritual lives.  We meet new friends, we delight in catching up with old friends who joined us. This is how it should be!!  Adult summer camp only better!

This journey will be likened to peeling a very large onion one thin, sheer layer at a time.  Nothing of this journey was simple or straight forward.

To put an event like this together it takes at least a year of planning.  That is okay, that is what I do.  I enjoy doing these kinds of things!  The earlier you start the fewer glitches, right?  Not ;).

As we are approaching sail date, a friend who at the last minute decided that she should come on the retreat, for she needed spiritual refreshment and focus.  The cabins were sold out!  All cabins on the ship were booked.   There was one option and it was to share my cabin, a simple inside cabin, a no frills cabin.  She was fine with this option.  What she did not know was that there were no more cabins.  She invited another friend along,  they both purchased air fare  at a rate that could not be ignored!  First major snag, there was no place for this second friend.  No room on the ship!    Now what?

Pray.  That was my only option!  A cabin opening up was a long shot. (God doesn't make long shot statements, this one I own.).  So we went to prayer.  As this story unfolds we see that this snafu was God's idea.  I cannot describe in words the angst and the emotions I experienced as I tried to figure out a 'how to make this plan work'.  My back was to the wall. 

Two weeks and counting.  Another guest has to cancel her trip due to illness and surgery.  A cabin slot opens up.  Amazing!  God was opening up a berth.  Issues continue to pop up that stand in the way!  It just does not make sense!

1. My friend could not afford the cost of balcony cabin.  It was one of the nicest on the ship thus expensive.

2. The other guest  who was now without a cabin mate, was an older person, she did not answer her phone to be  asked if she would agree to a different cabin mate.  She had no email address, we were back to square one.  Why? Everything on paper looked so simple

One week to go before we sail.  After a great deal of effort and finally getting to communicate with our single guest, it was decided that my two friends would share my simple cabin.  I would take a risk and room with this person.   My thoughts were,"She signed up for a spiritual refreshing retreat, she is probably delightful." "This is a very expensive cabin. It has more room than most.   I am certain I can make it work."  "My schedule will be busy so I won't in the cabin much should this person not be to my liking" was my plan B.   My friends were both coming and I was going to be a 'big girl" willing to make a new friend.

Sail date.  Friend #1 came to me and said that friend #2 was claustrophobic!!!  Oh my,  the cabin she was going stay in during the week would be too much for her!!!!!   Oh my! We had not even sailed and I had an issue.  Ah Ha!  Claudia gets a brilliant idea!  Wrong, this was to be God's idea! I learned this later! 

I ask my friend #2 if she would be willing to take my place with the mystery guest?  I would just switch names once we got on board, the cost of the cabin would be covered under my name and it seemed like a win/win.   I knew my mystery attendee was older and I knew she was traveling alone. Neither were issues for my friend!! Miracle! My friend's liking and skill set is to work with older people.  She would get the cabin she previously could not afford.  She was delightfully willing.  Whew!  Issue resolved.

Sail date.  Before we sail, I meet the cabin mate.  Red flag #1 emerges.  She wanted a wheel chair.  Hmmm?  She had walked onto the ship.   She had walked to the desk where we met.  She had no one who would be 'wheeling her around', strange scenario.   There was no wheel chair available.  As she walks away I am thinking...why a wheel chair?

Red flag #2.  As she leaves me after requesting her wheelchair, she tells my friend that she is going to 'pray a white angel' around me instead of a dark one.  She needs to get near me for this to happen!!    My friend who has great insight into the spiritual realm, steers her away. My friend knows this is not good. I have moved on to my next set of issues at hand and do not learn of this until later in the evening.

Red flag #3.  We meet as a group for our first time, it was a wonderful teaching session.  We are excited and ready to embark on a grand week together.  Our 'guest'  is not part of our meeting but no one picked up on this. Our meetings were not mandatory and  she was traveling alone.  My friend goes to the cabin for a much  needed nights sleep.  Oops, it is not going to happen.  Her  new cabin mate is angry. No one came to get her and lashed out at my friend.  She proceeds to get ready for bed only she does not sleep.  She is up most of the night.  She has major body function issues, another scenario is unfolding quickly and it is not a good one.

Day Two- at Sea.   Her behavior is not improving.  My friend meets me in the a.m. looking less than happy or rested.   My friend shares with me many details that make me grateful God spared me this roommate.  I could not lead this group and care for this lady. God truly had rescued me and I realized this immediately. I am feeling quite bad that my friend drew the short straw and had to be the rescuer on my behalf. This lady should have never come on this trip!   What do we do next?

I get in touch with my company that sets up the cruises and they tell me to contact medical staff on the ship. It is imperative to have situations like this documented.   I do.  Uh Oh!!!  You can't just ask a question for general informational purposes and let it go.  They had to investigate.  I will shorten the story but they had her come down for a check up.

Have you ever had a child that was really ill, you take them to the doctor and they are fine?  Yep, she was fine.  She was coherent, her vitals stable she was ticked though at her friends that she thought had reported her.  (We did not know who they were.)  God was working.

Day Three- The next night was worse for my friend.  We port in Grand Cayman, our high maintenance guest,  stays on board  and my friend gets a reprieve.   What to do? This question hangs over all of our heads.  That evening after dinner, my friend  graciously gets her roommate to the cabin to sleep.  She now has a break and goes to play games with other ladies in our group.   She returns to her cabin after midnight to find her cabin mate missing.  Panic sets in! We know that our  lady is disoriented often.  We report to the ship that she is missing and security goes into full force.  It is 1:00 a.m.  Security comes out of places one never knew existed.  They take lost guests very seriously.   After a frantic ship search,  it is discovered she had called 911 and was taken to the medical facility. As the Group Leader I should have been contacted if one of my people goes to get medical help.  That did not happen.

There is no sleep on the ship that night for us.  My friend is told to come down at 6:30 a.m. for they were taking her to a hospital.  I step in "Hey, I am in charge.  I should be that person."  Security tells me I can't see her.  ????  I am to be in charge and no one is listening! 

Day Four - We have just ported in Jamaica.  The doctors arrange for an ambulance to take her off of the ship and get her a hospital.  Remember, I am in charge.  My company tells me that I am to go with her. I am in charge!  I am responsible for her!  Uh Oh!!  The ships security won't let me go, they won't even let me see her.    I am torn between two worlds.  In one world the instructions I am to follow are from my company.   The other world hold to the rules imposed by medical privacy laws. The ships  security team are tying my hands.  STRESS.   Travel agencies do not leave their customers alone in foreign countries.  The ship sails that evening with out her coming back on board and I am no longer responsible for her.  STRESS I have just lost a person under my watch.  Relieved that she is off my watch.

Okay you say  "Where is  God in all of this?"  Oh let me tell you!

1. I needed help and protection from this guest.  God arranged for my friend to make that happen.  He started by making a way to get her registered and on board a full ship at a price she could afford. Her claustrophobia allowed her to be moved to the most significant cabin on the ship that week for His purposes.  There are few people I know who have the skill set that my friend does for situations like this.

This lady had shared with my friend that she was a 3rd degree/level Wiccan. (White Witch. They can and do invoke spells on people. They worship the very adversary we reject as we choose to worship God the creator and savior they reject.)   Her desire to 'pray' a white angel over me was not a good thing, quite the opposite.  I was kept from her presence the rest of the trip, not by my doing but by The Lords.

2. The check up  from the previous day, where this lady seemed okay, gave the medical team enough documentation to release her for more help. I/we did not have to wait a couple more days to get her off of the ship and out from under our watch.

3. I did not share about all of the mishaps with prearranged documentation that upon arrival to the ship,  really caused some issues for me.   Messed up dining room seating assignments, messed up conference room assignments, were just a few issues that greeted me on day one.   Well, one more mess up kept my name off the Contact/Group Leader roster.  This was the best blessing of all!  Since my  name was not on this document, I could not go to the hospital or be with this lady.  God protected me from having to be in her presence.  The cruise line had someone to do that task and stay with her until she could travel home.

 My friend now gets a beautiful balcony cabin to call her own for the rest of the trip.  She needed a rest and hunkered in for some sleep and solitude, until our last day.

I will share this here, that it was her 'open' cabin on our last night of the cruise when the mother of our guest who died by falling off the ship, stayed.   God had brought this friend to help me in both of these situations.  Her personal life story prepared her for such a time as this and these two very hard situations.

Those first 48 hours seemed like a week. But awesome things were about to unfold.  As our adversary was busy trying to distract and defeat the blessings from The Lord.  Those issues did not stop lives to be transformed. :)

If you have made it this far into the story I am impressed.  Even rereading what I just wrote drains me. So many details that make this account even more intense have been left out but I leave you with this, God is in the details.  We do plan our ways and He DOES order our steps.

Teach Us To Number Our Days

Today's blog is a hard one for me to write.  I could go two directions.  Do I share the events of the tragic evening or take a philosophical approach on life?  My mind goes in both directions.  I am debriefing on this page and again my emotions are running in all imaginable directions.

I was in charge of a group who had just been notified that one of my people had just gone over board. His mother was now in my care on whole new level!  A mother who just watched her son disappear into the sea.  She tried to catch him as  he called for help.  I kept thinking, STOP,  People just do not go overboard on ships!  This is the kind of thing you read about in a tabloid headline, not experience up close and personal.  STOP,  this really cannot be happening.  I knew this person! 

The night was long.  David and his mom had come to our retreat because of Damaris Carbaugh's music and ministry. All week long they had been blessed by the music, the sessions and the conversations that ensue in a group setting.  David came with his mom on the heels of being in a rough spot in his life. Our week had proven to be one of sweet, peaceful times. It was a restorative time with his mom and I believe his God.  All had been so good.

The drama of the evening unfolded quickly and then slowly.  The den of the ship was somber almost immediately.  The ship changed course and returned to the area where David had fallen.  The search teams were vast and intense.  To watch something like a search and rescue in real life was eerie.  People stood by the deck watching for something.  It was pitch black, minus the search lights and the stars. I kept thinking where do you look, where do you begin to look?  The sea holds such power over our tiny bodies.

People all over the ship were found in groups praying.  We found our group, many who did not even know that it was our person who had fallen, with cabin doors ajar praying in huddled groups.  There was a group of high school seniors on board who too were huddled in groups praying.  God truly was a known intently this night.  As I reflect back, I realize that makes Himself known in these times for there is no other hope or help apart from Him. 

This long somber night was framed with Damaris, Rod (the awesome husband of Damaris)  and Diane caring for this in shock, wounded mother in a cabin.  They prayed and comforted her.  They allowed her to talk.  Medical personal cared for this mother hoping to give her some sleep.   Damaris's music soothed this mothers troubled soul.  They prayed with her and listened. 

What do you do after a delightful weeks vacation finding that it ends with a tragic death?  What do you do when news like this is thrust into your world? You seek The Lord for all things! 

God was in the midst of all of this 'mess'.  The details would fill a book.  The peace given to me and the provisions of navigating this situation were amazing.  The security team, the FBI, the port authorities, those helping comfort the mourners within our group, the private car transporting us to the airport, where United Airlines took care of the hurting mom from check in to the landing back home were gifts that defy expectations. God carried us.  

I have been in contact most days with this mother. She shared that today is a family celebration of Davids life.  This will be a hard day, for loosing a child cannot be understood unless you have stood in those shoes.  I have. Loosing a child whose body will not be recovered to bury, adds to the pain. But I see God carrying this family just now.   The scripture above in the blue box, was shared with me by this mother.  She grasped that this was God's time to take her son home.  He is safe now and with the Lord.    

 The poem below was one David had penned when his grandmother died not too long ago.  His mother sent this to me a few days ago.  I share it now for it is a little window into the heart of this man.    He is now in the presence of Jesus, healed and whole.  His wounds from this world are healed and as scripture tells us.
"But He was pierced for our transgressions; He was crushed for our iniquities; upon Him was the chastisement that brought us peace, and with His wounds we are healed." Isaiah 53:5 - Bible

 
I close with this thought and scripture.    

"Teach us to number our days carefully so that we may develop wisdom in our hearts."  Psalm 90:12